Today was not one of my best.
After cutting 5 minutes short of my last class today, I went back to my office only to find another student waiting for me. He was there to see me for other reason. He seeks to see my tutor. While I was browsing the directory, little did I know, I've let out my frustration unintentionally. I was saying, "People always said that becoming a 'lecturer' is an easy job...". And this student of mine.. not that I want to hear an answer from him, replied saying, "Yes Mam, it is easy.". I told him, "That's wrong brother."
I recall back the talk given by Dr Abdi on Murabbi. As he said, it is always easy to become Mualim but never the same way to become Murabbi.
I kept asking myself, "have I done enough for the students?", "do they understand what I was teaching?", "what can I do to help them improve?", "how do I make them participate in class?", "why are they coming to my class with negative energy?"... I guess, I don't have the answers to all these questions... Some might say why bother to care for all that. My answer is, because I not only want to teach but hopefully insyaAllah, to inspire too...
It's 2:15am now.. the laundry is ready. Until then.